Sunday, June 2, 2019

What Happened


Does anyone read this blog anymore? Is anybody out there?

I know I haven't posted since late April... six weeks to be exact. It's not the reason you think.

I have been away from home almost the whole time. My daughter had a medical crisis, some travel to a hospital, a stay, surgery, and further treatment and care. She's doing GREAT now. Better than ever. But it took a lot out of us. I just came home a couple days ago and am trying to get back into some kind of regular routine.

I did not get on a scale the whole time I was gone. I was somewhere over 200 pounds when I last posted... can't remember exactly, but maybe 204 or something? Today I weigh 218. So, like, 14 pounds in six weeks. I ate a lot. Hospital food, fast food, vending machines, whatever. I paid no attention to my eating or my health. I did notice my clothes were strangling me.

Can that be undone, along with the other 20+ pounds I'd already gained since the car accident last fall? It really feels impossible.

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

I’m glad your daughter is ok, the weight gain is something that happens to a lot of us when we can’t devote so much time to it. I always wonder how much of my brain power is used for dieting and how much more I could accomplish if I didn’t spend so much time on healthy eating/exercising. I went on a couple of trips that took ten days. I gained 6 lb in 10 days and it was ridiculous because I was eating salads and passing up a lot of the treats that everybody else ate, yet I’m the one who gained weight!

There are hardly any blogs or message boards left to give me inspiration, hardly no way left to find people to commiserate with. Your blog is one of the few places remaining except for social media I guess but I don’t belong to any of that. I check your blog once a week on Sunday. I always noticed you post really early in the day for being on the west coast!

I think there are probably a lot more people like me, mainly read your blog and not comment often or at all. So you started the blog to help keep track of your weight loss progress but you’ve helped many people too!

Anonymous said...

I’m glad your daughter is recovering. Good that you’re back. None of my clothes fit either. I’m so tired of trying. Supporting each other can help. Let’s go! Let’s keep trying.
Theresa in Alberta

Unknown said...

Still reading your blog and still rooting for you!
Good news about your daughter. But don't lose sight of yourself!
Hugs, Antonia

Deniz said...

Hi Lynn, so sorry to hear that you have had a tough time. Glad your daughter is doing OK.
As to the lbs, yes, you can do it. I know it seems a massive mountain to climb, but you've overcome this a d more in the past.
You've had other priorities and kind of forgot your own health and wellbeing in the process. I get that, I really do.
Now can be your time...
Shift the focus back to looking after 'you' with healthy and tasty fresh foods, as you've done before.
It's hard, but we'll make it, both of us.
Love and hugs from across the water, Deniz

Anonymous said...

💗💗💗💗 so happy to hear your little girl is doing better, and that she was blessed with such a loving and supportive mother to accompany her through her medical struggles all these years. Remember to be gentle & compassionate with yourself. Remember that you are a fighter and a survivor 💗💗💗 -(stranger who has read your blog since 2008ish?)

Anonymous said...

I checked most days. I don't often comment. It amazes me how you can connect to people that you have never met. I have struggled with health and being over weight my whole adult life. I have always admired your honesty and posting even when things are not going well. Nothing is impossible.Each day is an opportunity to work on being healthy. You have done it before so you know it can be done.

Anonymous said...

Are you still on phentermine?

I guess it feels to me like you've gone through the gamut of quick fixes. Medifast, something with elimination dieting, Victoza, and recently phentermine. I don't think there IS a quick fix for dealing with weight.

I first fell into disordered eating when I was 13 and became anorexic. Later, at 15-16, I started binge eating as a reaction to the restriction. I've been seeing a nutritionist for the past FIVE YEARS (I'm in my 30s now). It's the only way I can keep from ping ponging back and forth between extremes. It costs me money from my paycheck--it's not covered by insurance--but to me, it's so worth it to maintain a healthy weight. I imagine it would be even more worthwhile if I had to lose 50 pounds.

Medical doctors don't receive much if any training in nutrition and exercise. A very good nutritionist (Registered Dietitian--RD--is the only valid credential in the field) does. And mine, at least, agrees to see some people by Skype or remote call, so you're not necessarily limited by whoever's in your area. What I like about my nutritionist is that she gives me the objective criteria required to meet my goals and is matter-of-fact about them. She measured my RMR and told me how many calories to eat based on activity level, and helped me draw up a rough, flexible meal plan. Then, if I struggle to hit my goals, we can troubleshoot. If I have any questions I can ask her. I can go in and say "Argh, everyone I know is either on the keto diet or vegan, should I do one of these?" and she can talk me down from fads that don't work.

Weird to come onto a blog and say not to trust what people tell you online, but I guess that's what I'm doing.

I'm glad your daughter's doing better.

--cron

Anonymous said...

I’m reading 🤗

I follow the blog using Bloglovin so every time you post, I see that you wrote in my daily report of blogs I follow.

I understand how it really feels impossible. I certainly don’t have the answer for you even though I’m 54 years old now (as in I feel like I should have figured it out by now but don’t and am also called obese).

My current focus is on being kind to myself, trying to get good sleep at night, and not eating after 8 pm because if I do, I don’t sleep well, and feel acid-y.

I hope you find something positive to help you feel better through this hard time. You may give up blogging or dieting, but please don’t give up feeling good about yourself! Ive got to know you through this blog and like you too much for that.

- Kathy

Anonymous said...

Yes! we are here and cheering for you. This is a bump in the road. Some of us have more bumps than others but we can never quit. So happy your daughter is feeling better.

Anonymous said...

Sorry about the recent bump in the road. But yes, it can be undone...! I know how discouraging it can be -- seeing those same numbers feels entirely different on the way back up the scale than they did on the way down :-(. But start now, today, with a focus of maybe just maintaining for the time being. Gotta stop that moving train -- you can do it...!

Splint said...

I still read, and am glad to see you back! And YES,it can be undone!!

Anonymous said...

We're still out here, sending you all the best! Glad to hear your daughter is doing better and that you are still fighting this fight. :)

Jenny B said...

Have followed you from the beginning! Still here with you and always love your updates the good and the bad 🖤

Unknown said...

Yes, we're still reading! Hang in there, Lyn - I don't have any words of wisdom - but know we are all cheering you on and some of us are in similar situations.

Lyn said...

Oh thank you! So good to see people responding! I am going to write an update post now :)

Lyn said...

p.s.... cron, last time I was on phentermine was in January for about 2 weeks.

Laura said...

Still reading! I've been with you since you started your blog, and I get an email every time you post.

I'm sorry you've been struggling so much! I feel like it shouldn't be so hard to maintain your weight when you have to make something else your focus; it seems so unfair. :(

I know you can get back on track with your weight! I have no doubt you feel frustrated and tired of it, and just want to give up after all of this time, but you've been through so much and done amazing. Your determination inspires me and I'm pretty sure, so many other people.

Take care! You're in my thoughts and prayers.
Laura

Amy said...

You have been missed. I'm sorry you and your family have been through so much, but it makes my heart happy that your daughter is better!
Yes, the weight is reversible, you just have to remember what got you in that mindset in the first place. You drew your line in the sand and didn't make too big of a goal to start with. Maybe your starting point should be to maintain where you are at for a few weeks before you start trying to lose anything. Small, steady steps that you are OK with mentally. Sometimes you have to do what you don't want to do in order for it to feel good. For me, that is physical exertion of any kind; I dread it until I'm in the middle of doing it, then I realize it makes me feel so good.
I'm so happy you are writing again!

Cynthia Schott said...

I read your blog religiously. I'm always rooting for you. Much love, Cyndi

MaryFran said...

Yikes do your daughter! I’m glad that she is doing well now!

There will always be bumps where we have a bit of a gain. You’ve hit two pretty big bumps in recent months. But don’t give up! It is possible to do it! You know how...you’ve had success! You will have success again! Tighten the reins and gather up your motivation! Get back to the basics!!!

Anonymous said...

Still here yes :)
I never comment, but check in on your blog about once a week.

liz said...

I'm here : )
I checked your blog weekly to see how you were..
I'm sorry to hear about your daughter I'm glad she's
better
I also haven't been on the scale in months, you were brave
I'll follow suit