Thursday, February 15, 2018

Off the Phentermine, Update


So far I am doing okay without the Phentermine. I am definitely eating a bit more volume, but trying to make that added volume nutritious and low calorie/carb. This week we went to a potluck dinner and there were several food choices; I settled on a chicken vegetable soup (with no pasta or rice in it), some raw veggie sticks with dip, and a few cubes of fresh melon and pineapple. That's pretty much what I would have chosen to eat on phentermine, but I was hungry again before bed and needed a low carb snack. Right now I am baking some chicken drumsticks for lunch, and will make some broccoli salad to go with them (or to have in the afternoon when I get hungry). I am kind of just pretending I am still on the phentermine and behaving in the same way I did when taking it (you know how you feel like you don't want to "mess up" and are more motivated to be stricter when there is a short term crutch involved? It's like that.)

Funny thing. You know how I wrote about how I have been wearing large, loose clothing all winter so my body is not really on display as much as it will be in warmer weather? And how with the new bra, smaller jeans, tighter sweaters I was getting some more attention? Well it started to get a little overwhelming lately, so I actually went back to the crappy bra and bigger clothes for a few days this week. It felt like I could "hide" a bit and not have to feel weird about all the looks and comments (which I do like, but after awhile I start to feel self conscious). So yesterday when we went to our church's Ash Wednesday service, I deliberately wore my big, loose jacket and not-tight jeans to avoid any attention. It didn't work, though... a friend who I haven't seen in 3 months was standing with another friend and when I walked up she just gasped and said "Oh my God, you have lost so much weight!! You look amazing!" I admit that made me smile. It felt good. I couldn't help but wonder how shocked she'd have been if I was in clothes that actually fit and a good bra! Made me laugh.

Last night I dreamed about weight loss. I dreamed of trying on a lot of new clothes and noticing that every time I tried something on that fit, the next time I wore it, it was too big. In my dream, though, it was not upsetting. It made me happy, even though I kept having to find new clothes to wear. I was content and satisfied with my new body and its changes. Accepting of it. There was no anxiety about it like there has been in real life in the past. When I woke up, I felt this is the new attitude I am adopting about my weight loss. It feels so much calmer and happier... exactly what I need.




7 comments:

16 blessings'mom said...

You inspire me! You really do! I am working really hard at staying away from sugar, eating low-carb, moving more...and when I read about your progress, I am so happy for you!!! :) I remember when I first started losing weight, (I was really overweight for 20+ years), and people would comment continuously about how good I looked, and I know they meant well...but jeepers, did I really look that bad before? I wanted to shout, "I am the SAME person!" And when I gain a little back, I am still the same person! But it is so nice to fit into those smaller clothes and get some confidence back...happy for you!

Nancy Lien said...

Lyn, just found your blog this morning and I'm so impressed that you were able to put your struggle "out there". Your story could be my story. I realize now that in the end I have myself to deal with so I stopped doing anyones "plan" or taking any so called craving or appetite suppressants. Here's what I think, I'm 67 and when I was growing up, hardly anyone was overweight, my mom didn't put on her nike's and run ever!! and she was, at most 125 pounds nine month pregnant. After I had my first child in 1974 I weighed in at the doctors office at 144 lbs and he put down in my chart I was "obese". I like to sew and have old patterns from the 60's and 70's and size 10 then is like a size 2 today. Something obviously is making us all fat. I thought Mrs. Olson from the Folgers Coffee commercials was fat but when I saw this commercial recently she doesn't appear that way at all.

I even tried a thing called HCG, where you give yourself a shot of this hormone every morning, eat 500 calories and loss 1/2 to 1 pound a day for 40 days, and it worked but not long term. I even recently went to a hypnosis class and I am to listen to a 30 minute self hypnosis tape for 30 days. I'm only into about a week into this and it's getting annoying. I'll never give up trying to weight less (we are about the same size) and I wish you well. Thanks so much for sharing your experience, I'll continue to follow in hopes you find an answer.

Nancy Lien said...

Oh Lyn, I had one other thing I wanted to tell you. I'm reading a book called 'Change anything, the new Science of Personal Success' that seems to have some good ideas for me, it seems I keep doing the same thing over and over without success. Problem is I have trouble finishing things at least half the time so I haven't finished the book yet, haha

Anonymous said...

I'd love for you to keep posting on your Instagram feed. It would be interesting to see how your intake changes (or not) without the phentermine.

Lyn said...

16blessings'mom~

thank you! It IS hard work, I think, no matter what, when you've been used to eating whatever and then try to switch to low carb. I find the keto desserts help me a lot for those days I want a sweet. Keeps me from caving to the actual sugary sweets! And I know what you mean about the comments. When I lost weight I got all those comments about how much "better" I looked. People even said things like "you just didn't look well" or "I cannot believe how great you look now." Which was all fine and good until I regained and looked "worse" again, and knew how people felt about me.

Nancy~

I think a lot of the obesity issue now is the diet of processed junk and how readily available it is, along with fast food and high fructose corn syrup. You're right, there just weren't a lot of fat people back when my grandma was young. Thanks for the book recommendation. I will look for it at the library :)

Anon~

I really should. It would be pretty boring right now (a cup of tea, a slice of cheese) but I should start taking pics of my actual meals/dinners again. I've just gotten out of the habit. Will try to remember at dinner tonight!

Anonymous said...

Don't break too long from the phentermine Lyn. I took it for 3 months in 2014 and lost 32 pounds. Then it "stopped working" (no more weight loss, hungry all the time, no energy). My doc told me to take a one WEEK break to get it out of my system, eat slightly higher calories to re-set my metabolism, and then start taking it again. If you wait too long your body will "forget" how to use the medication to lose weight quickly and it won't ever be as effective again. I followed his directions and when I took it again a week later it worked like new. Just give that a try, no harm done even if it still won't work for you right? Better to get all the weight off before having to face it without any help.

Nedra

Lyn said...

Anon/Nedra~

That's interesting. Thanks for sharing your experience. I've been doing some reading online about re-starting it after a short break. Will see how this week goes without it and then decide whether to try it again or wait for my next appointment with the doctor who prescribed it and see what she thinks.