Sunday, May 22, 2016

Underwater Victory


I started this blog way back in August, 2007. At the time I weighed 278 pounds and was just miserable. My health was deteriorating, my mobility was next to nothing, and I was truly feeling like I'd hit rock bottom with my weight. The highest weight I had seen on the scale was 283 pounds, and I knew I was headed straight to 300+ if I did not make some immediate changes. I did make those changes, and although I've been down (to 175 pounds) and back up near 250, I never got close again to my original start weight. And I've maintained my mobility. You'd be surprised, if you haven't experienced it, how incredibly different life is at 280 versus 225. The 50+ pound difference in my weight has resulted in a huge improvement in my quality of life and happiness. I try to remember that, and be thankful, especially on the days I am feeling defeated about the 50 pound regain I am in. But it is not a 100+ pound regain and that, believe it or not, makes all the difference. It keeps me working at this even when I end up "just maintaining" as I am at the moment (at 227 pounds). "Just maintaining" has changed my life in a wonderful way... and if I am honest about it, losing that much weight probably actually saved my life. This is what keeps my from giving up. This is why I am still trying to lose more and maintain lower. Once I am under 200 pounds, I feel like I am in another, better world physically.

Anyway, about a week after I started this blog, I wrote a post about "The Humiliation of Being Obese." In it, I wrote:

[There was] the time I went to the museum and thought about going on a submarine tour and then saw a large metal plate with a hole in it and a big sign: "You MUST be able to get through this hole unassisted to go on the tour." Um, No. I am NOT going to go in front of everyone and try to squish myself through that hole. (Got anything I can grease it with?) Better to realize it then, than to pay for the tour and try to get on the submarine and get stuck in the entry hole, I guess.

Well, guess what? Last week I chaperoned a field trip with my daughter's class. Imagine my surprise when the leaders brought us as a group to that VERY hole and told us we would be taking the kids on that submarine tour! I almost had a flashback about it to the time when my kids wanted to go on that tour years ago and I KNEW I would not fit in that hole, no way, no how, so I had to make up some excuse and distract them to some other exhibits. This time, though, I was the chaperone! If I didn't go, the kids didn't go. And this was in front of dozens of other kids and chaperones and teachers, all waiting for their turn on the submarine tour. This time, I looked at that hole and I knew I would fit. Not only did I easily fit through the hole, but when we went down into the narrow halls and stair wells of the submarine itself, I did not have to squeeze. I did not have to turn sideways and hope my gut didn't knock something over. I fit JUST FINE. And THAT was such a victory to me. I know if I was 20 pounds heavier it would have been a really tight fit. Thirty pounds and there is no way I could have done it. But at 227? It was fine! I fit without embarrassment and we had a great time together.

THAT is what the past 8 years of blogging and working on my weight and health has done for me. I may not have stayed at goal, but I did not go back to hell, either. I can do so much more. Heck, at 278 pounds I could barely walk a block! Now, I was able to walk for miles on this field trip without issue. Oh I was sore, really sore for a couple of days. I hurt a lot after walking what I am guessing was around 8 miles a day, plus lots of stairs. But I did it, I took pain medicine and I am okay. Life is SO much better now than it would have been had I never made the effort and changed my life: starting moving more, stopped binge eating, got a grip on food obsession and compulsive eating, and made my life *not about the food.* There is still work to be done, but I am confident things will only get better.

If you are stuck and miserable, please try. Yes, I know you've tried a million times. But try again. Don't give up. I had done every diet under the sun before it finally "stuck" and the weight started coming off for good. You never know which *try* will be the one that works. So keep trying, because your life can be so much better... and you don't even have to hit your goal, or be skinny, to have that better life. Twenty, thirty, or fifty pounds will make such a difference that you won't believe it. So try. Try because freedom from the food is the best gift you can ever give yourself! And you're worth it.

14 comments:

Lori said...

What an incredible victory! I love how life gives us second chances like that sometimes.
Lori

Anonymous said...

When were you back up close to 250?

Lyn said...

Lori~

Thanks! I do too, and I hope for more of them :)

Anon~

February 2015, 248 pounds. You can see all my weights through the links in the sidebar: Weight by Month, and Weight by Year.

CARLA said...

<3 <3 <3 <3
LOVE.

Anonymous said...

That is so cool! It must have felt amazing to go on that tour. Question: on the last post your food looked like a tiny portion. Is that a regular size dinner plate? Are your meals usually that small?
(Tina from IL)

Lyn said...

Anon (Tina)~

Yes, it's a regular dinner plate, and yes, my portions are small. I get full on a smaller amount now (after Medifast) which is nice! That was approx 4 ounces of pot roast.

~Oct said...

I love this post. Such great encouragement. Congrats on taking your life back and thank you for being gracious enough to wish your success on others. <3

Anonymous said...

Now this-- sounds like success! Congratulations. :)

JDET said...

What an uplifting story! You have a great message to share! Thanks!

Anonymous said...

This is such a good post. I have worked years trying to loose weight, I have managed to keep 40lbs off for good but would like to see another 40lbs off. I keep trying just like you say ;)

MGC said...

Love this post! Go Lyn! Celebrating the small victories is something I need to do more of.

Rachel rbs said...

That's wonderful advice. I, too, have tried every diet plan under the sun until something finally 'stuck'. I just crossed the 42 pound mark, and definitely feel so much better with just that weight gone.

MyStalkerIsFat said...

I'm really glad I found this today. I am struggling and have tried so many times, I wonder why I don't just give up. Thank you for your advice!

Jana Snyder said...

Lyn: I love this story; your journey is so inspiring!

I've shared it on my blog: http://startwhereyouaretoday.blogspot.com/2016/05/lyns-weight-loss-let-her-go-places-she.html

I especially love that you're able to see and verbalize the progress you've made and the benefits you get even though you aren't currently at "goal" weight. GOOD JOB!!