So by Tuesday I had again had some gluten (lasagna at a potluck) and fried food (French fries again) and said to myself as I often do, I think I need new goals.
I tell myself it's okay because I had a 2 inch square of the lasagna and the rest of what I ate was great, health-wise (salad, broccoli, squash, and fresh fruit... skipped the dessert table) and I did not go back for seconds on anything. Calorie-wise it was a fine meal. Same with the fries, although no one can delude themselves into thinking fries are healthy in any way, but having a half cup of French fries is not the end of the world, either. Part of this is my inner conflict of trying to follow my ED counselor's advice of not banning any foods but eating anything in moderation to mentally normalize food. I try to do it but there is this nagging feeling that no, eating that stuff is just not good for me.
The walking is going well and I feel so much better getting outside and just having time to walk and think and enjoy nature, walking wherever I want without being in a rush to get somewhere. This mini vacation (packing now) will be both active and relaxing: cottage on the beach, near old growth forest, with plenty of places to hike. We have a full kitchen so I'll be bringing groceries and cooking healthy meals. When I get back I'll weigh the next morning. See you then!
A Message to Open my Eyes
6 hours ago