I've gotten a few emails from concerned friends this past week or two, basically asking me why I have changed my blogging focus away from my weight so much in the past month. People wonder what I am actually doing, weight-wise, diet-wise, because I have pretty much stopped talking about it. Well, that's true. I haven't gotten on the scale in weeks. I am not weighing, counting calories, counting carbs, tracking my food, showing pictures of all my meals, listing everything I ate, or making weight-loss plans or goals. I am just stopping by and sharing brief life updates, some health updates, and a post about multi-colored carrots. That *is* a big change.
In nearly SIX years of blogging, I have always posted a weight for the first of each month. I have a "Weight By Month" link in my sidebar to prove it. But this month? Nothing. Why? People are asking me... "What are you DOING??" So before you make assumptions about what's going on here, let me just tell you.
It is time for a change. I think that having severe plantar fasciitis for 15 months turned me into a bit of an introvert (in person) and pulled my focus off my actual life and living and into my head. When I couldn't walk, I could sit and think. When I couldn't finish my household chores, I was stuck in the recliner and spent a LOT of time blogging, reading blogs, thinking about blogging, and over-analyzing my diet. I got so wrapped up in my head and so desperate to get the weight off yet it felt to me like nothing was working. My pain was really bad, and debilitating, and depressing, and sucked me into a different state of mind. Only when I became PAIN FREE last month a few days after the second cortisone shot did I "wake up" and realize how much I had changed.
Now that I am FREE to take walks, do household chores, go shopping, and do pretty much anything I want to within reason without pain, my whole mindset is brightened and I am seeing this whole diet thing in a new light. Well, actually, I sort of took the whole diet mindset, crumpled it up, and threw it in the trash. I am not thinking about diet. I am not thinking about OMG how much weight will I lose this month? I am not *worrying* about it or *plotting* about it or "trying to figure it out" anymore. You know what I am doing?
I am following the plan the Medifast dietitians gave me. I am giving it time to work. I am eating well and giving my body time to adjust to the HUGE increase in activity that has come with the lack of pain.
I had to sort of let go of the blogging a bit. I needed a change and I needed to just DO what I feel I need to do (eat on plan, exercise) without worrying and stewing over the details and the what-ifs. It is very freeing, even if it results in a rather boring blog for the time being. I do want to keep updating because I don't want people to worry. And I assure you that yes, I *will* get on the scale and I *will*, at an appropriate time, sit down and assess whether or not this plan is working for me and giving me the results I want. But that time isn't now. I can no longer be impatient and try to judge a plan based on a couple of weeks' worth of effort. I need to give it time, and while I am giving it time, I am living. Not focusing on "diet."
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