Monday, January 28, 2013

Relief

It feels like *such* a relief today to not be weighing myself, not worrying about what the scale might say tomorrow, not tracking calories and carbs etc, and not trying to tweak anything. I swear it was sapping my energy. Honestly my goal right now is to just ignore food. Just to think about it once a day (dinner, which will be tuna casserole tonight) and treat the Medifast meals as fuel the rest of the time. That is what worked very well for me before, and I am hopeful that just doing it and letting the time pass will get me to my goal.

This whole weight loss thing hinges on one thing, really: my state of mind. Yes, it matters what I eat or whether I am exercising. But more than that, I think what matters is whether or not I am at peace with food. It matters to me whether I am using food to cope with stress. It matters whether I am spending too much time on weight loss and not getting results. It matters whether or not I am obsessing about carbs, protein, fat, artificial sweeteners, coffee, dairy, half and half, supplements, gluten, legumes, and salt. It matters to me. I tend to get all wrapped up in those things when I am frustrated, rather than going off the rails and eating junk. That's what I used to do in the past: get frustrated with something (how I am feeling emotionally, my health, the numbers on the scale) and just quit trying. Eat ice cream instead. Now, my response to frustration is to get wrapped up in the details of my eating. Well, that's not been a very helpful response... even though it is better than eating junk. I need to find a new response and/or quit getting frustrated. Avoiding the scale and avoiding tracking are ways to not get frustrated as often, but I am still working on a new response. I have let the stress get to me and let me stay caught in this cycle, and I am working to make a change.

My daughter is home sick today so we are having lots of down time. She just has a cold, nothing big as long as it doesn't turn into a sinus infection. We are enjoying time snuggling on the couch, watching Shirley Temple movies, drawing and reading. I am making her fruit/yogurt smoothies and cinnamon toast. The last two days she has been up in the night for about 2 hours per night (once with leg cramps and once with this cold) so we may have to take a little nap later.


8 comments:

LHA said...

I really think you have hit on something here. At least these feelings are very familiar to me because I share them. In addition to not weighing more than once a month, I also have to be careful about obsessing over food and counting every little gram, ounce, calorie, carb, etc. It always ends in a frustrating disaster for me, and I dieted for decades!

I don't do well on some plans like WW because of all the constant counting and recording of what I eat. I know it works well for some people and I applaud them, but when I am using that type of diet ALL I think about is food, 24 hours a day.

I have done much better since adopting some simple guidelines and sticking to them. When I start to obsess, I simply repeat this "You have done all you can do about that right now". I use it like a mantra and try to go right on and concentrate on something else. I hope you find your new attitude continues to be freeing to you.

Anonymous said...

When you feel that frustration, why not exercise? You've said you don't have time to fit in any weight work but you could do 5 or 10 minutes every time you feel that frustration. It's just replacing that time you spent obsessing over calories, fat grams, etc. with something productive and stress relieving.

Anonymous said...

Hi I have been following your blog for a while. I felt immense relief for you after reading this post. Forgive me if you have covered this already but have you read Geneen Roth or Beyond chocolate. Also a really good one that deals with our addiction to food and offers some way to manage this is Gillian Riley 'eating less' or her ditching diets. This books still support weight loss but in a way of looking inside and not outside of ourselves. Maybe it's not you but the diets... Selling us something that is not doable on a permanent basis. Sometimes obsessing about cals/carbs etc makes us think about food more and want it more. Take care of yourself. I am also on the journey of being kinda to myself but also just trying to care for myself more. I hope you look into these books even if you continue to diet I think they can still help you.

Anonymous said...

One of my favorite (of the seven) Eating Guidelines is to eat with enjoyment, gusto and pleasure. Really. To let yourself have, taste, enjoy what you are eating. To take time with it. To be aware of it. When you do that, when you focus on this bite rather than the one on the plate or in the bag, time slows down. Let yourself have what you already have instead of missing it by focusing on the next one. Written by Geneen Roth sent by Sara

lisa~sunshine said...

I also got a lot of help from Gillian Riley.. I've commented to you about her before.. she has a monthly newsletter which is free to read and her archives are on her blog.. I think it's eating less.. Her books Eating Less and Beating overeating are both great.. Her new book which is available for download Ditching Diets is actually a rewrite of her book Beating Overeating..

bodyandsoulreset said...

Yes, that scale can be a chain weighing us down - especially when it doesn't show us what we want to see. So many times I've been going along great and then I make the mistake of stepping on that scale and don't see what I want - and it completely derails me! I am working on not obsessing over those little numbers - but I'll admit - it is hard. Hang in there!

Anonymous said...

You are being flexible and making adaptations to this new response to your plan. Good for you Lynn.

When I lose slowly I try to envision just how big and fluffy only one single pound of fat looks like. I even google a picture of it sometimes to help me realize just how freeing it is to lose even 3 lbs a month.

You have all the macro knowledge and personal experience to know just how to keep the weight off this time once your plan is done.

Just think , 3 x 11 is 33 lbs by 2014. You'll look and feel amazing. Keep on keeping on!

Miz said...

nothing reignites my zest for life like those snuggle days.

xo

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