Thursday, January 3, 2013

Get Serious

I am feeling reeeally bloated today and the scale shows it (especially that NEW scale!) It's my own fault... I did have Medifast meals all day yesterday but my Lean & Green meal was not so lean. It was a taco salad at a restaurant and the meat was greasy and salty. The, um, taco shell, which was made from a flour tortilla, also managed to become part of the meal... so my carbs were way up again. Yeah, I guess I have not been terribly serious about focusing over the past week. I admit that. Not serious at all. I have a lot of stuff on my mind. If I was serious, I'd have ordered chicken fajitas with extra lettuce and tomatoes and no tortillas. But I was not serious. Hopefully I can turn that around today.

Anyway, today I'll come back and post my food intake, calories, carbs, fat, etc and try to get my head back in the game. Yesterday I did six minutes on the recumbent bike and I'll go for ten today. I am not going past ten until my foot pain is gone. I also am going to walk the dog about 1/2-3/4 mile today and see how much or little pain I get from that. I hate being in pain all the time so hopefully upping my activity won't cause a big flare-up.

My weight goal for this year is 1) to see a loss every month, and 2) to be done with this already.

22 comments:

Anonymous said...

What is your weight on the new scale?

i should be full said...

I take issue with your description of yourself as not focused and not taking this seriously. I think you are extremely focused and the seriousness with which you take this journey you are on is tireless.

That said, you are clearly struggling with staying on plan. I understand that. Goodness knows I've been "off plan" far far more often in my life than "on plan". I get it.

This past week I went out to dinner with my husband to an ice-cream parlor restaurant. Walking in you could smell the grease. I ordered a salad with grilled chicken. My husband commented that he was impressed with my willpower. The truth was that I just don't eat that way anymore and the salad was what I actually WANTED.

My humble opinion is that you seem to be focused on this process as "trying to lose weight". When you started out you were trying to get healthier. Maybe it would help to re-conceive this process as simply finding out what your body needs and doesn't need to be maximally healthy. Then you don't have to think of it in terms of deprivation for weight loss but instead think of it as "this is just how I eat".

To make a long story longer, I like to think of it in terms of vegetarians or people who have food allergies. They don't say, "Oh, it's more convenient to just eat what the hostess is serving even though it's steak and I'm a vegetarian." Or "Oh, I'm too tired to cook so I'll just eat peanut butter and jelly tonight even though I'm allergic to peanuts." I've convinced myself I'm "allergic" to refined carbs. (Not literally, but the analogy works for me and keeps me on track.) That way, I'm not being deprived by not eating the mac & cheese, I'm giving myself the gift of care by not eating it.

My whole point is that I think you sell yourself short by saying you weren't focused or serious. I think you are. You put so much energy towards tracking your food and caring for your feet, which is really good. At the same time putting more attention towards the emotional stuff that gets in the way of your eating plan would probably help too.

Anonymous said...

I think alot of us are in the same boat right now, so don't beat yourself up (even though I beat myself up RELENTLESSLY for the exact same behavior). I've been reading your entries for many years, routing you on & being inspired by the sheer force of your will! I have been away a few days & just read over your last few entries & was (shamefully) happy to not be all alone in my falling off the wagon over this last week. I was just complaining to a family member that I was an ANGEL for weeks up until the first fated bite of "real/regular/desired" food. It was all downhill from there. And I was complaining that it took me 2 weeks to lose 8 pounds (which was wonderful) & 6 days to gain 8 pounds right back. REALLY? 3500=one pound, my bodacious backside. If that were true I'd be 600 pounds by now. Plus, now I am STARVING all the time, and I wasn't before the first stupid bite. Why do we do this to ourselves? Some sort of human nature glitch. We can get past it, but it is sooooo frustrating. Sorry for the rant, but I was excited that I was not all alone in this! Now on to better days....

Lisa :-)

Traveling Light said...

Oh, man. I hate when that happens. (And for me in 2012, it happened about every third day, so I know the feelings those mis-bites engender.)

So. Deep breath, Lyn. Make today a fresh start. "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" blah, blah, blah. Fill in whichever platitudes will help you flip that switch to "NO!" for the OP choices and "YES!" to your health. (Personally, I'm having a love/hate relationship with that mysterious switch.)

Know that I feel for you. I really do. When I read the beginning of this post, I felt my heart sink. I'm so close to that edge, myself...and slipping over it feels so bad.

Moving on. The feet. I know absolutely nothing about what I'm talking about here :} but it occurs to me--since your foot trouble has been so recalcitrant for so long--that, perhaps, you should not do BOTH biking and walking the dog in one day.

Pick one or the other and see how that goes. Undoing your foot improvement will not undo the carb consumption, you know?

Hugs

Deb

Karen said...

Why do you choose wheat when it hurts you and causes pain?

Lyn said...

Karen~

why does anyone choose to eat things that make them obese? Obesity is no fun. My short answer is it tastes good, and sometimes we foolishly choose the short term reward over the long term good.

Dreaming of New Me said...

I totally understand where you are coming from. At least you admit it and you will do this. You have proven it before.

Karen said...

Here's to breaking the cycle in 2013. Food sobriety is all kinds of awesomeness. Tough sometimes. But worth it. Any concrete plans to break that cycle?

I remember how hard it was. Pick a time when your motivation is high. I had 40 years of it. It can be overcome.

Anonymous said...

I agree with the commenter who said that you are too concerned with the process of losing weight, than you are about getting healthy. In the last few posts, you've mentioned how you "just want to get this over with"-- but in reality, it's never going to be over. Ever. Yes, the weight loss portion will end, but your eating habits cannot change drastically if you don't want to see a big regain. I suppose the Medifast portion can "end" after a certain point, but if that is really what's bothering you so much, then why not do Paleo or Primal? You've mentioned wanting to do this when you transition off medifast anyway. If the reason is because Medifast is the quickest way to lose weight, then you have to be prepared to be incredibly strict once you transition off because, as you have seen, the weight gain will be incredibly fast if you don't.

Long story short, this won't really "end," Lyn. You are going to have to be incredibly strict with your eating habits for life. Even though Medifast has helped you lose weight, I do believe that such a prolonged very low calorie lifestyle has decreased your metabolism, and as a result, regain will be easier for you than most others.

David Dane said...

Hello Lynn, Long time no comment to each other... This is my second attempt to comment. Do you feel bloated? Well, you may want to consider getting some food enzymes from the health food store, or the Vitamin shop. I use them now to help me digest my food. Also, you may want to look into using HCL betaine when you eat meats, or any proteins, or milk. I have been using the HCL now for well over four years, and recently started using "Digestive Enzymes" in the capsule form.. Just a thought dear.

MargieAnne said...

Hope today is working out better than yesterday.

I do find that when things have gone a bit wonky and it has become really difficult to get back onto the tried and true plan the only way back is to make today better than yesterday. Today doesn't need to be perfect, just better and the same again tomorrow.

You can do this.

Blessings

Fair Enough said...

I was pretty much disabled for about about 2 months last year-prior to and right after spinal surgery. I know what it's like.

But listen-you really, REALLY have to get moving as quickly as possible. You need to find something that works, something you can do.

I'm not trying to make myself sound like a saint, I'm not, but I *did* force myself to exercise little by little once I was ready. I started with very small walks outside and gradually built myself up to my current level, which is very long hikes/walks and uphill.

There has to be *something* you can do-biking, a low-intensity workout video, free weights, anything.

You can lose weight without exercise but it is very, VERY hard and basically leaves 0% room for slip-ups of any kind.

Lyn, you need to exercise. That's all. I know PF sucks and really hurts but you have to find something.

lisa~sunshine said...

I agree with a lot of what all your comments have been..
Digestive enzymes have helped me huge.. they also have a multi tab which includes the betaine HCL he's referring too..
Also maybe try chromium for the carb issues you are facing.. but really.. I think like other said you have to think of your carb and wheat issues as a NON negotiable item.. It's a hard place when you are intolerant instead of allergic.. with the intolerance we tend to do the things we shouldn't because we aren't immediately effected.. although if I eat gluten bread.. I immediately can tell in my throat..
The other day I was reading something about gluten and plantar fasciitis and I thought of you.. I seen several internet places that tied them together.. Just wondering how much you have looked at that? I know you wanted out of the pain with your feet so maybe telling yourself you are allergic to gluten/wheat is what you need to do?
I think formulating a program for yourself and NOT being so hard on yourself tha it's as CLEAN as what you think you need.. is what you need to do.. I am dieting down but I don't have ON plan or OFF plan days.. I fit what I want.. within my diet.. Just a thought.. but I know you wanted to do medifast..
I agree with you needing exercise in SOME way.. to establish a routine.. I get that your feet hurt but I'm wondering why you can't do a upper body dumbbell exercise routine? I actually do kettlebell swings because they are easy on my knees and I get a good workout which is both cardio and strength all in one.. it just works for me..
Anyways.. no ill intentions intended.. I know you will get this going this year.. You can do it.. You have a lot of people pushing and rooting for you..

Anonymous said...

I think all the comments are great. You can tell people really care and really want to help. I have to sort of disagree with some when it comes to exercise.

A good way to get a feel for the role of exercise and diet is to read body building message boards. Bodybuilders agree that exercise has very little to do with weight loss. You MIGHT be able to burn a couple hundred calories a day but to burn more takes a lot of high intensity aerobic activity.

I lost 40 lbs in 2005 with Medifast and Wonderslim. I went from a BMI of 25.0 to around 19.0. I did no exercise. I kept it off until last year when I had spinal surgery, a hysterectomy and a ruptured appendix for 3 surgeries. I'm at BMI of about 22.5 now and want to get back down.

I'm only saying this to tell you it will work! I know what it is to be overweight too, I used to have a BMI over 30 yrs ago.

Look up something called a TEE calculation. When I punch in my stats I can only eat about 1650 cals per day to MAINTAIN. That means to lose a pound a week I have to eat at a 500 cal. deficit everyday.

One taco salad was probably almost 1500 calories.
It will never get easy but as one poster suggested, pretend you're allergic. I tell people I'm allergic to carbs, they make me break out in fat. If I order anything with bread I wil eat it! I either change it when I order or take it off the plate before I start eating. I do that when maintaining as well.

Finally I want to leave you with this thought. You must change everything to a positive approach. You are not an obese person working to be thin, you are a thin person working to get that back! You deserve to pick your goal weight that you want, not just the goal weight that makes you healthy. That will come as a bonus but if you want the extra flexibility, the ability to pick out the clothes you want, whatever, then do it! You don't have to only have a "good" reason (health), you to do it for any reason you want and you deserve that!
Sorry this is so long, I hope it's not too preachy, I only hope I can help maybe. You have a wonderful blog and I like all the comments too!

Anonymous said...

Did you ever find out what the positive test was from your last blood workup? You said there was a confusing message on your answering machine about it and I was wondering if you ever found out what the issue was.

Time 4 Me said...

Lyn, I just found your blog last night and I have to say, I am very very impressed with your tenacity. You have a LOT going on right now and you need to know that it is OK to slip up. Although, it's good to read that you recognize it and are preparing to tackle the weight that you've put on due to your injury. I don't really have any great advice. For, I myself, just joined medifast. I'm a 47 year old mother of 3 who devotes everything to my kids and husband (hence, my user name) So, this is for ME. I need to lose 40 - 50 lbs and plan to read your posts daily to keep ME in check. I'll be blogging my success too and I hope you know you are a HUGE inspiration to me. Keep going! You'll be back in those size 10 jeans sooner than you think! Many blessings to you!

Lyn said...

Anonymous~

yes, the positive test was an indicator that I may have an auto immune disease such as rheumatoid arthritis; that's why I have an appointment with a rheumatologist in a few weeks. Hopefully he can shed some light on it.

Anonymous said...

Was it the ANA test? Just wondering as I am dealing with this also. I wish you the best of luck with it.

How is your foot pain after the biking and walking today? I hope it is better so you can keep up the activity.

Lyn said...

Anonymous~

no, it was a different marker. My feet are sore tonight, quite sore but not as bad as they used to be.

Fair Enough said...

To the comment about exercise not being as important as we think, body building forums, etc-yes, you're right to an extent. Diet is key, really, you can't eat horribly andc expect to "work it off" like so many think.

BUT...I am talking about very modest exercise here, maybe 20 minutes a day. That is advised for most everyone.

Lyn-I kind of misread this post at first, bad habit of reading too fast, and I do think it's good you're trying to be active again...I would visit message boards for those with PF and see what they have to say about exercise options. If water is one thing that really works, I personally would say spending the $ on the pool would be well worth it.

Melodee said...

I had a terrible time getting a grip after I got a new scale. The difference in the weight was 7 pounds--and somehow that contributed to the beginning of a terrible spiral that ended in me regaining 60 pounds. BOO HISS! I'm back on track now but seriously, that scale was a nightmare.

CatherineMarie said...

Lyn,

Just a suggestion or two. Most restaurants now have gluten-free menus. Use that. And maybe make your "big meal" (if you are going out) lunch, or an earlier dinner.

Also, maybe you need to use a different measurement than the scale. Maybe you need to do "goal" clothes. Buy something that doesn't quite fit. Something half a size too small. Visualise yourself fitting into it. That will give you a reward when you do fit into it.

And maybe save the weigh-ins for once a month?

Can you get a yoga ball? I found, for me, that thing makes a difference. It gives some stretching, some movement, but also some support.