Last night and this morning I am struggling. My brain keeps thinking about stuff I want to eat. It is hard to ignore. I've been staying on plan... yesterday afternoon was when I started craving things like candy bars and crackers and sandwiches and all the sugary and wheat based stuff I've been avoiding. I even split my dinner into two different meals to push back the hunger and cravings; earlier in the day I had a small bowl of chili (no beans) made simply of lean beef, peppers, tomatoes, beef broth, and celery, and then later in the evening I had a whole small can of water-packed tuna mixed with light mayo and eaten on cucumber slices. Yeah, I really wanted that tuna salad to be on Ritz crackers, but the cucumbers were a better bet. None of that made my cravings go away and there was seriously a short period of time that if I'd had a bag of mini Snickers in the house I would have eaten several. I even had a flash of a thought where I imagined making up some excuse to run to the store to get a Snickers bar. But I held out.
This morning I woke up thinking of cookies and lattes and sandwiches, and I am fighting my brain to NOT just go get the things I am craving and eat them. The little voice says "you can get right back on plan tomorrow!" But we know exactly where that little voice leads us, right? I don't want to go there.
So I am posting here instead, hoping that admitting it and having people 'watching' me will help me be strong and not eat things that are harmful to me. I don't need the extra pain and joint inflammation from the sugar and wheat. I don't need to see a higher number on the scale. I don't need to indulge myself in a pity party of potato chips and ice cream today. I need to stay focused and eat healthy so I can feel better. Really, 90% of my days it is pretty easy to choose healthy foods. I just have to power through the other 10% when I want to eat the old, favorite crap foods.
Off to take my daughter to school and NOT pick up a latte.
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