I had a really hard time last night fighting the food thoughts. It's funny, I don't really care for a lot of junk food these days but some of it still really calls to me, like cupcakes from a bakery. I am PMSing and made the mistake of going to Costco last night. Oh wow, the bakery stuff was just SCREAMING at me. I mean SCREAMING. It was almost deafening. Why do they have the fruit right by the cakes anyway? Well, I got out of that area and went towards the front where out of the corner of my eye I saw that giant candy aisle with all the super ginormous bags of candy in it. Again, I am not a candy bar fan anymore, but those clear plastic bins of chocolate covered nuts and fruits seemed to have long arms and claws reaching at me, trying to jump into my cart. I still crave M&M's too. But I got past it all with my frozen Mahi Mahi fillets and was checking out when I glanced at the line next to me and saw a big, dark, chocolate cake going down the conveyor belt, followed by a plastic container of almond toffee candy. Good heavens. Well I kept on going, right past the little Costco food area with pizza and churros and made it all the way out to the car and back home.
But it took a toll. Do you know what I mean? How you can be fine, not hungry, not really craving anything and then ALL THAT STIMULATION and exposure from a supermarket or a restaurant or whatever just triggers something... some strong desire to have it ALL. I dunno, it was nuts. I came home and had dinner and when the kids went to bed, I was practically pacing the floors wanting all that junk I saw at Costco. Wanting to bake a pan of cookies and eat them all myself in the night. Wanting pizza and salty stuff. PMSing in overdrive. Finally I made myself a salty-and-sweet indulgence plate.
1 ounce of sharp cheddar cheese
4 green olives
2 thin slices of bacon (35 calories each)
1/2 ounce of pistachios
1 teaspoon of roasted pumpkin seeds
1/2 tablespoon of peanut butter spread on 1 square of 90% dark chocolate
water with lemon juice in it
Then I felt better.
This morning I ate my oatmeal and went to the gym for half an hour to strength train. My hint of a cold seems to be gone and the kids are much improved. Peach smoothies and magic chicken soup are working wonders.
Have a good weekend!
Friday Update and Reality Check
7 hours ago