Over the past few weeks, the days have been getting shorter. That has always affected me in a negative way. It's probably too soon to see true Seasonal Affective Disorder, at least not in full swing, but I think it is affecting my mood and energy a bit already. I am starting back on Vitamin D3 today plus probably should get back on a good multi, too. I have been lax in taking my supplements.
I also wanted to share something kind of silly... but interesting. I use Method foaming hand soap in my home because it is natural and I like the foam *without* it being antibacterial. I like to try different scents. There was a new one called Bay Leaf the other day so I got it. And it smells really good but to ME it is an appetite suppressant scent! I noticed it when I was eating a snack and the smell from my hands every time I brought them to my mouth made me not want to eat anymore. I put the snack away. This happened a couple of times before I realized it really *was* the smell from the new Bay Leaf soap that made me want to stop eating. So if you see it in stores you may want to give it a try just for fun. I usually get it at Target but this is what it looks like (so you know what you're looking for... it is WAY too expensive on amazon though!)
I just cannot believe it is September. It *really* snuck up on me this year.
The other day I was driving home from errands when I saw a little grey kitty lying dead in the road. I got teary-eyed as I drove by. I thought about how I wished I could pull over and wrap the kitty in a towel and call the number on the collar tag before school let out; I thought about the children who might walk by and find it. Maybe the cat belonged to one of the children at the school a few blocks away. More than once I thought about going back or at least calling someone because I knew I could not handle removing an animal who was in that kind of a state, having been hit by a car. As I drove home I felt guilty for leaving the cat there and worried about the kids, so after a brief stop at home I drove back the same way on my way to get my daughter from school. And the cat was gone. Someone else had stopped to remove the kitty... maybe someone else on their way to get their child, who didn't want the kids to see that. I was very thankful for that person.
And then in an instant I remembered the day I came home from school to a similar tragedy. I was 8 or 9 I guess and my beloved kitty was always the first thing I called for when I got home and walked up the tree-lined lane from the country bus stop. As always I opened the screen door into the kitchen and called for my cat. My father came to me. The rest is a blur of days and weeks of tears, of crying and longing for my cat, of lying in bed alone at night instead of snuggled up into her soft fur. It's always been a vivid memory... the very painful loss of my cat, which my father told me had been hit by a car and killed. As a child I never thought about what happened to her actual body; I just knew she was gone and that was all the pain I could take. But when I was older, for some reason my mother decided I should know that while I was at school, my father had walked down the lane to get the mail and found my sweet kitty dead on the road. It was shortly before school let out. And she told me that my father had cleaned up the remains as thoroughly as he could so there was not a trace of evidence of what had happened. He did this because he did not want me to come home to that... to see that when I got off the bus. He knew what that would have done to me.
I never thought much about it except that it was very good of my Dad to do that. But the other day when I saw the kitty on the road I suddenly was completely aware of *what* my father had done for me. For the first time I know. I know how he knelt in the road in his perfectly pressed pants and the crisp collared shirt he always wore... how he did a task he so did not want to do and did it out of perfect love for his child. I know how he probably knelt there in the road after cradling my cat away and cleaned every remnant until it looked like nothing had ever happened. I know how he went home and found a place for her body and went inside, tears in his eyes and aching heart, knowing I would be walking in the door any minute asking for my cat.
I love you Dad. You were a good man, a good father. I miss you.
I don't really have a point to this story. Yeah, I could tie it in to weight loss or cleaning up our messes or doing unpleasant tasks or something like that. But it's not about that. It's just about a man who loved his daughter enough to do something that was no doubt hard for him. It's about whoever it was who stopped the other day to remove that kitty and make sure a child was not traumatized. Thank you to that person. And thank you to all the people who bring goodness and kindness to this world for the sake of others. May we all be that kind of person.
Friday Update and Reality Check
18 hours ago