Today the scale said 185 pounds. That's exactly what it said on February 1, as well. I guess I am getting good at maintaining, at least. It's no easy task to maintain after a huge loss, and I've been around this weight now for 6 months. Well, I was trying to *lose* weight over that 6 months, but I will look at the maintaining as the silver lining.
That's about the only good thing I have going at the moment. I am still sick, still on painkillers and two kinds of strong antibiotics at once (3 weeks on antibiotics) and a steroid. My body is still recovering from the flu, and the doctor today said I have a staph infection in my sinuses. They are so compacted that if this infection does not resolve in the next ten days I have to go back in for a CT scan and/or MRI. My symptoms remain: exhaustion, severe constant headache, congestion, and nausea. Oh, there *is* another good thing... my ear infection has resolved. I still can't hear quite as well as I used to, but the fluid should be gone soon. My blood pressure is also up significantly but they think it's because I am sick, stressed, and in pain, so hopefully that will also resolve itself in time.
I keep trying to take care of myself. I am drinking lots of water, taking vitamins, forcing myself to go out in the cold and rain for at least a 15 minute walk with the pup each day. I am really not getting enough sleep *at all* though... maybe 6 hours a day, broken up in 1-2 hour chunks. I am eating a mixture of healthy and junk... everything from fresh fruits and vegetables to chicken soup to ice cream to a donut and lots of coffee. Honestly, some days I just feel so miserable and in pain (since I can't take the painkillers when I have to drive, so I just take over the counter stuff during the day) that I do turn to food for comfort. Some days I have no sugar, no junk. Other days I just wallow in it. I guess it is balancing out since my weight seems stable right now. I don't think there is much chance for me losing weight until I am feeling at least partly better.
Thank you for the caring, kind words and support many of you have left me in comments and emails. It means a lot to me that people do care how I am and wish me well. Your words have been a comfort to me during a hard time. I hope your kindness returns to you in your life tenfold in your time of need. Be well.
Food on the Brain
1 day ago