Monday, July 26, 2010

Eating is Easier

When I am bored, eating is easier than finding something productive to do.

When I am tired, eating is easier than forcing myself to keep working or convincing myself to take a nap.

When I am angry, eating is easier than feeling those unpleasant feelings.

When I am sad, eating is easier than crying real tears.

When I am scared, eating is easier than facing my fears or screaming into my pillow because I don't have an answer.

When I am rejected, eating is easier than feeling the loneliness.

When I am frustrated, eating is easier than finding a solution.

Eating is easier than really living. But do you really want a life shrouded and numbed by food?

Do you really?

Is it REALLY easier? Not in the long run.

Sitting is harder than running, when you are unable to join your little ones in play.
Riding is harder than walking, when you have lost your mobility due to your weight.
Lying on the couch is harder than taking the stairs, when your children are going to bed each night without kisses.
Eating is harder than dealing with life, when you realize your days are limited and you've wasted them focused on food.

In ten, twenty, thirty years, where will you be if you take the easy way? Will your life be easier then?

Losing weight is hard. Being fat is hard. Maintaining is hard.

Choose your hard.

43 comments:

Food Addict said...

Well written - and totally true. I always feel like it's easier to eat - but you're right in the long run healthy is easier.

Jen said...

LOVE your post today. I have been reading for a long time and I am so insprired by you! Thanks for your honest raw posts

Lucy said...

I love this,

Love it so much I will probably quote you later today.....

Thank you.

Lanie Painie said...

so right, so right

Diana said...

This sounds like it was right out of Geneen Roth's newest book. Although you haven't mentioned reading it so I think this is probalby your original idea.

Geneen talks about "bolting from life", not facing the real issues in our life, not feeling the pain, not crying the tears. She's says it's not about fixing the issues, but facing the issues. Suddenly, it makes a lot of sense to me. I've spent my entire life running from myself, from my problems.

Now it's time to face the problems, feel the pain. Food, in excess, doesn't fix a thing. It only makes things worse.

spunkysuzi said...

I love this post! So very true.

Julie Lost and Found said...

Yikes. so so true. Thank you!

big_mummy said...

love love love this post and so true. Really something to think about

Glenn, Fat at Fifty-five said...

Can't argue with this post. Today I was saved from a binge by the fact it was harder to go to the store to pick up the binge items than it was to just have a big glass of water and get back to work...didn't stop the fantasy of eating though. :)

Momma Hunt said...

What a great post, this is something that I just discussed with my therapist this week. It is all hard you just need to decide which one

Stephanie said...

This is really well said. Thanks for sharing it.

Lori said...

"Choose your hard" I love it!!

Lyn said...

Diana~

I haven't read her new book, although many folks have recommended it. I will probably get it at some point. I have read a different Geneen Roth Book, Breaking Free from Compulsive Eating, published in 1993. It was insightful but her methods did not work well for me at the time.

-J.Darling said...

Thanks Lyn! I'm having a super stressful day and I've actually found that my appetite is pretty much completely gone. Wow. Didn't see that one coming. I guess my binging is under control for the moment!

Missa said...

I like the idea of choosing my hard and not letting it choose me.

Rockin post.

Cheers,
Missa
LosingEthel

georgiabe said...

Choose your hard. I like that. I'll be quoting you. :)

Shane G. said...

Wow, that is poignant. And to add to it, just using food as a weapon never actually gets rid of the problem, it only adds to your problems whether immediately, in the future or both. Great post.

Bobbie said...

Again your blog has spoken exactly what needs said. You are helping grow through my own process. I'm a long way from where I need to be but closer than I was. Thanks Lyn.

ryry the adventurous said...

YAY! I love "Choose Your Hard"! I loved it when you first said it and I love it now! You rock, Lyn. :)

Michelle said...

Thank you.

Trisha said...

THis post touched me in a personal way. How many times have I eaten instead of coping or living. Thank you for this.

Christina said...

Very touching - thank you for being able to put your feelings into words so well.

Anonymous said...

I am a regular reader of your blog, but I never comment. This post touched me so much that I had to say something.

At the young age of eighteen, I'm facing my food demons head on. It's hard. But losing more of my best years to binges and layers of fat is harder.

Thank you.

Beth said...

I just found your blog -- and have just started my "healthy journey" (aka diet) for the billionth time.

I find your blog so inspirational. Thank you so much for sharing your journey!!!

losing.it.mjh said...

This Saturday, I'm printing off a copy of this post for my WW leader and several of the ladies...and for myself. I want to look at this every time I look in the mirror. I want to have to read this every time I want to open the fridge. This post is beautiful and eloquent and everything I feel and need to hear everyday. Thank you.

Floriana said...

So true. Great post!

D... said...

I just discovered your blog and read this, what a great post, it really hit home fore me, very poignant! I look forward to reading more of your posts.

Vee said...

Agreed. Well written. Sounds like you had some introspection going on. Vee at http://veegettinghealthy.blogspot.com

Maes said...

"Choose your hard" I love it. It's going on my fridge and bathroom mirror!

Hugs,
Mares

401sue said...

Choose your hard. So profound for me. You are so right.

MissyMcM said...

EXACTLY!!!!

Hope said...

So true! Sometimes it's hard to remember though, that being fat is hard. And eating is only a temporary, easy way out. Great post!

Linda said...

Lyn,

This is so true. Eating is not really easier than being in an electric wheelchair or not being able to run to save your own life. Not be able to pick yourself up off the floor if you should fall, or just the excruciating pain on your knees and hips because they are so worn out from all the weight. I love this post and will print it out to remind me that eating is not easier than looking the other way.

Linda

Julie said...

This is so true and really puts this whole journey we are on into perspective! Thanks!

Shannon said...

Oh, this is lovely, and it really hits home. This is something I will be rereading when the going gets tough - thank you!

Joanna said...

Choose your hard - I've never looked at like that before! I've chosen mine. Inspirational, thank you x

Shana said...

OUTSTANDING post!!!

Ashley said...

Lyn,

I have just spent every minute of my free time over the past week or so reading every single one of your blog posts, and I can't find words to tell you how inspired I am and how happy I am for you.

I wanted to cry a few times because my story is like yours in so many places. I am 22 years old, and your blog opened my eyes and showed me where I'll end up if I don't do something RIGHT NOW.

I have been overweight and a binge eater all my life. I lived with my grandparents for a while, and they would feed me anything I wanted: dessert for meals, fast food, pizza. I weighed eighty pounds at age FOUR, and by seven I was over 100 and I'd learned to take my allowance money to the mall food court and order two meals, pretending I was ordering for two people. I'd ask for it in one bag and throw away one drink so my grandma wouldn't know what I was eating when I got back to the table.

In middle school I started getting teased for my weight. I started skipping breakfast and eating only an apple for lunch, and I dropped down quickly from 150 pounds to 115. But I felt like I was starving to death every night and often sneaked out to the kitchen for food, only to be caught and berated for sneaking food at my weight. And when no one was home, I'd go crazy, eating everything I thought might go unnoticed - bowl after bowl of cereal, ice cream bars, leftovers I didn't even like.

I kept up this starve-then-binge routine until I moved out and found myself in an abusive relationship. After an argument, I'd be bruised and exhausted. All my plans for the day faded away and all I wanted was something yummy to smother my feelings in. I didn't have anywhere to turn except to food, and my weight went up and up because of it.

And I never unlearned this habit even when I could feel safe again. Over the past year I have been gaining and gaining, seemingly unable to stop eating out every single day. I am not financially well off, and I can't count the number of times I've let my bank account overdraw and charge huge fees for cookies, fries, or pizza.

I knew I needed to change, and your blog gave me the motivation to start. Since I've been reading, I've lost eight pounds. I've eaten healthy meals every day without overindulging or starving, which is a first for me.

And because of YOU, I know that when the pounds start dropping more slowly, I will still be able to stick with it. I no longer want a quick fix that will drop me down thirty pounds in a month. I want to be healthy. I want to be free.

Lyn, I can never thank you enough for what you've done for my life. You are the first role model I have ever had. I am so sorry you have had to go through so much in your life, but at the same time I am so happy that you've saved me from the same experiences.

Thank you so much.

-- Ashley

Lyn said...

Wow, Ashley, I am so touched by your story! Thank you for sharing that with me. I am moved that you have truly understood what I am trying to share here. And if that saves you from years of misery down the road, I am SO pleased and happy for you!

Honib1 said...

Healthy is always better.. lord knows that when I do not do what I need to do I suffer .. and I often forget this very simple little fact about myself..

screwdestiny said...

Wow, with the whole first part of that post I could have replaced "eating" with my addiction and it would have totally applied.

I also loved the last thing you said, about everything being hard.

Lynda with a Y said...

I did a walkathon for MS a few months back, and our team wore t-shirts that said, "don't sit when you can stand; don't walk when you can run." This is a great post and I thank you for it.

Hanlie said...

That makes perfect sense! Thanks Lyn!