Thursday, April 9, 2009

Squooshy Fat

Yesterday, I noticed that my fat is starting to get squooshy. When I put my hand on my hip, my fingers sort of indent into this ultra soft bed of foof. My hand doesn't just "lay" on top of a firm, thick layer of solid fat like it used to. What I mean is this: Imagine taking a big ol' raw beef brisket out of the fridge, with a thick later of fat on top. Rest your hand on it. It's solid, and sort of firm, and doesn't have much "give" to it. But if you lay your hand on a plastic-wrap-covered bed of, say, marshmallow fluff... or whipped yogurt... your hand would sort of sink in and be partly surrounded by softness. That's how it is.

Maybe this is grossing you out, but hey, I am excited. I used to have huge slabs of fat on my body. My preggo-looking belly FELT like there could be a baby in there... you could push on it and it felt pretty solid. Like it was full of something. Now, my preggo belly is a *lot* smaller, but it has also changed in consistency: mushy, cushy, pliable. If someone in a supermarket came and tried to pat my tummy because they thought I was pregnant, they would quickly withdraw their hand in shock, because otherwise their fingers might sink in a couple of inches and *obviously* there is no baby in there.

I heard someone say once that when you lose weight, it's like letting air out of a big balloon. At first, when fully expanded, the balloon (your skin) is filled with air and feels pretty solid. But let the air out, gradually, and feel the balloon. The "skin" doesn't shrink and stay taut on the air; at some point, the balloon feels sort of squishy and soft and wrinkly. Well, my skin isn't wrinkly, but it feels deflated. My arms, my thighs, all of me has this extra soft feeling as my skin has not quite shrunk to fit the new fat loss. I don't have much of what you'd call "loose skin," mainly because I still have a hefty layer of fat under there, but it IS more skin than I'd need if all the fat was gone. But... it almost feels like my fat has not only gotten less abundant, but also less dense. Spongier or something.

I don't mind the feeling. I kind of like patting my belly and feeling it squoosh in, knowing I am not stretched to the limit with solid fat anymore. And I really believe that as I continue losing weight, and the remaining fat diminishes, the skin will *mostly* follow. I am good with that.

I am almost back to normal this morning after a week of sickness. No one threw up yesterday! Yay! And I ate a normal dinner last night (haven't had any veggies yet... but will try some cooked ones today and see how the stomach handles it). I am re-hydrated, too. Scale says 226.

21 comments:

Janene said...

I am so happy for you!
I have slipped off the wagon since the beginning of the year. So hard to get back on!
I read your blog posts faithfully, but don't always leave comments. But I just wanted you to know that you imspire me!

♥ Dee ♥ said...

I hope you are lotioning your body! It helps to keep the skin moisturized to help it to shrink as much as possible.

Kelly said...

My fat is squishy too. It was freakin me out a little. Glad to hear I'm not the only squishy girl out there. ;-) So it just means that you're losing weight? I'll have to google "squishy fat" but I'm afraid of what the results might be. :-O

You're doing fantastic. I've really enjoyed following your story.

Drina said...

Lyn, if you're anything like me, the squishy fat will stick around for a while. I was 286 pounds at my heaviest, and like you, was pretty solid and my skin was taut. In the last 2 1/2 years I've lost a little over 130 pounds, and even though I'm now a "normal" weight, the fat that I do have left feels soft and doughy. Hopefully, as I tackle these last 10-15 pounds or so that will change a little, but I don't count on being totally solid ever again.

Shelley said...

I hear ya on the squooshy fat...my belly and my upper arms are so soft and pliable - some days I can't stop touching them! Sick, I know, but I'm putting it under the "body acceptance" category.

Glad you're feeling better!

Lady Downsize! said...

This is something I noticed recenly. Things a more jiggly than they used to be, and I really don't mind. I like that fact, because it means that I am on my way to something even better - smaller than the biggest person in the room!

Anonymous said...

Firstly, I have spent the last few days reading your blog from the beginning after being linked to it from somewhere else (which I can't even remember anymore!). This is now officially one of my favourite blogs around.

Secondly, I hear you on the "squooshy fat". I've lost some weight and have sort of noticed that recently, especially in my tummy. Like you, I can't really say that it's loose skin, since there's obviously more than skin there. Hopefully as I keep working out and lifting weights it'll work itself out in the end

Mike579 said...

Congratulations! It's a wierd feeling isn't it! I have that same thing. It's like fat cells are emptying...

The thing I have only recently come to terms with is that weight loss is really a long-term thing. You really can't rush it. It takes patience for sure.

Graized said...

I'm seeing that in my gut as well. Saggy, squishy, deflated. I'm gonna have loose skin for sure. How much is still up in the air...

Arielle said...

I love how positive you are! I've really yo-yo-ed (is that a word?!) with my weight and my skin is very similar to how you describe!

I really like how you described it - I feel a little better now - I guess I always look on the worst side of things and think its going to get worse rather then focus on the fact some weight has gone! Anyway I don't think I've commented on your blog before? Just wanted to say I like it! Its blogs like this that really motivate me :)

Mary @ A Merry Life said...

I hear ya on this one. Squishy fat is waaay better than solid slabs of fat. I'll be squishy any day.

Juice said...

Yay for squishy! I have about 10 lbs to go before I hit goal weight, but my belly pudge is still squishy. (And I play with it too!)

Foodie McBody said...

Can I just say how much I LOVE this phrase??

***my fingers sort of indent into this ultra soft bed of foof***

I know EXACTLY what you are talking about! Feel like I am suffering from deflated-balloon tummy, but oh well. I'll take it.

antgirl said...

I still have deflated flabulence myself. I have a love/hate relationship with it. My solace comes from knowing, with work, it does go away, too.

Glad you're enjoying being squishy. :)

Ditto on the moisturizer suggestion. It does help the skin to forgive.

Ceres said...

My thighs are pretty tight, but I notice that in my belly. I hope it goes away soon :-)

justjuliebean said...

I've heard various opinions of this (Lyle McDonald has an interesting forum), including that the fat is being temporarily diffused with water before a weight drop. I have it a bit on my stomach and I'm too small (and losing too slowly) to worry about loose skin. It seems to be common, but it seems that if it was THAT common, there would be more research on it

Eden said...

Yes, squishy fat. I have that too. Or at least I'm assuming I will continue to have more of it as I keep losing. Right now my squishy fat is in the stomach. I look forward to seeing if it ever fully disappears.

afatgirl said...

I cannot wait to get to that point!! I still look and feel 9 months pregnant(and my 9 month old baby is laying on my lap asleep right now; so I'm pretty sure I'm not!!)

As a lurker (and new commenter!) I wanted to thank you for sharing your story!! I am inspired by all that you are going through!

Penny said...

I'm not sure I'm completely right here, but I think I remember hearing once that the soft fat in the ab area comes from the loss of visceral fat (the particularly nasty stuff that is packed around your internal organs). Visceral fat is the reason why men's beer bellies are hard.

So squishy is a good thing. ;)

Mike said...

Hi,

I recently started a diet and have been following your blog for a week. I really appreciate your candor.

Heather said...

oh yes, I have that ALL over my stomach and hips. I wish I could look at it like you though, because I just want it gone and no matter how much I work out, its still there. Im glad that you can be proud of it because it means your hard work is paying off!