Last night, I dreamed was fit. I was still sort of heavy, but I was strong. I was with a bunch of people and we were doing exercises. I was hanging from this ladder thing like a monkey bar, and I was inverting myself with my legs pointing up and I was doing pull-ups like that. Everyone was impressed. Boy, it felt good to be so strong. I have never done a pull-up of any sort in my life. Even in middle school when we had to do those Presidential Fitness tests, I couldn't do a pull-up. I always felt like a wimp. I may never do inverted pull-ups like I did in my dream, but I am hanging onto that *strong* feeling, and maybe I will do a real pull-up someday!
I want to feel strong. But to feel strong, I have to work out more. I really like how I feel *after* I work out. It's the *before* that sucks.
"I don't wanna."
"I'm too tired."
"I'll do it in an hour/tonight/tomorrow."
"It's too cold/rainy/windy/hot/dark/sunny outside to walk."
"I would rather watch TV/read/take a bath/cook/goof off/clean toilets."
Once I do the Nike thing and just make myself "do it," I am always glad. I feel better when I'm done: stronger, happier, more energized. I don't know why it's such a drag to get started.
Weigh-in for today: 235. Which is down 5 pounds from last week, but up one pound from a few days ago. I am bloated and SORE from PMS right now. Did I mention SORE?? I hate PMS. But five pounds is good; I'll take it.
So, I was supposed to be taking my daughter on a road trip for a couple days to a Children's Hospital this week. She has some procedures and appointments scheduled, so her father was flying in to go with us to the hospital. I'd asked the local doctor about any possible complications from her recent illness/medication and they said it shouldn't matter. Well, this morning I called the doctors at the hospital, and was told that because of her chronic conditions, it would be a really bad idea to sedate her for procedures while she is sick, so we had to reschedule. This is, I think, the FOURTH time this trip has been rescheduled. She was supposed to have one procedure done last summer. Now we are rescheduled for very late April. Sigh...
Anyway, her father is still flying in tomorrow and will be here for 2 weeks. We'll see how that goes. I've already asked him *not* to buy any junk or snack stuff while he is here, so hopefully it won't be like last time where I was waking up to bags of candy on my laptop.
One of my boys is sick, too. I really hope I don't get it.
Bethany requested my recipe for Thai Green Curry. I looove green curry but the restaurant version is SO high in fat (with oils and coconut cream) and way too spicy hot for my tastes. I messed around until I got it *perfect* (to my tastes) at home. Not very spicy and much healthier. Here ya go!
Thai Green Chicken Curry
14 oz can of light coconut milk (reduced fat/"lite")
1 T. green curry paste (from a jar. I used and recommend Thai Kitchen brand. Some brands are MUCH HOTTER than other brands.)
2 boneless skinless chicken breasts cut into bite sized cubes (raw)
3/4 T. fish sauce (I used Thai Kitchen brand again. I never used fish sauce before. It smells DISGUSTING!!!!!! Vile!!!!! But once it is simmered in, it no longer tastes VILE and DISGUSTING and gives an authentic flavor, so don't shy away if you smell the fish sauce and gag.)
1 T. + 2 tsp. brown sugar
1 can of bamboo shoots, drained
1 clove of garlic, minced/pressed
1 tsp. ginger (I got this in the produce section in a tube... fresh minced ginger paste)
onion powder, garlic salt, soy sauce, basil (Thai basil if you have it, or use whatever, or omit)
In a saucepan combine the coconut milk, curry paste, ginger, and garlic with a whisk. Heat over medium heat and simmer for 5 minutes. Add chicken, fish sauce, brown sugar, bamboo shoots, and simmer uncovered for 15-20 minutes. (Gentle simmer, not a rolling boil). Stir frequently. At the end, add about a tsp of soy sauce, and season to taste with a sprinkle of onion powder and garlic salt and a bit of basil. Watch the salt... you can overdo it.
This is fantastic served over steamed broccoli. That's the very best part IMO. I gave the kids brown rice with theirs. This is a very mild curry. If it's too mild for you, you can add more curry paste OR add a dash of cayenne at the end. Reheats great for leftovers.
We're having tacos for dinner. I am using half ground turkey and half extra lean ground beef, light cheddar, light sour cream, lettuce, vegetarian refried beans, salsa, and heart healthy tortillas (for the kids... I will have mine as a salad... with black olives... yum!)
And as a little hurrah to myself, when I was in the grocery store, the Reece's PB Easter Eggs were SO calling to me. I wanted one in the worst way. I was in the checkout line, considering going back for a Reece's Egg, and had this conversation in my head:
"Yum, I want one."
"Nah, you don't. You can't lose weight eating candy."
"Yeah I can. I bet it is only 250 calories. I can fit that into my day."
"One won't satisfy you. It will be gone in an instant and you'll just want more. You know it takes a whole bag of those to make you feel satisfied. You've never been satisfied with one, or even two or three."
"Ugh. You're right. But I want one anyway..."
"No. You don't even really like how they taste. Remember how every time you eat them you end up thinking they don't taste as good as they did when you were a kid?"
"Yeah (whining) but I like those. I can't just quit eating them FOREVER. I should have one last Reece's Egg."
"Your knees are all screwed up. You need to get some more weight off first. You need to get under 200 pounds for your knees sake. You can go back to eating that crap when you get to 189 pounds."
And that was that. In my mind I *knew* I can't just "go back to eating crap" when I lose some more weight (or I will regain), but hey, whatever it takes to shut up the inner brat.
Forward we go...
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