Wednesday, April 2, 2008

The Blinders Are Falling Off

I feel like I have been living in the dark for ten years. Maybe longer.

Last night my kids and I were watching The Biggest Loser. Several times my kids have commented on Ali being so thin. She does look fantastic. (Bear with me here if you don't watch the show). I was looking at her the whole time thinking, wow! What would it be like to have a body like THAT? To look that amazing? To be that thin? At the same time I felt like I could totally imagine what it would be like to move so freely and look normal and be able to wear cute clothes.

She got up on the scale, and it said, 146 pounds. Then it hit me. "Hey," I said to my boys, "I weighed less than her when I married your Dad, and even after I had my first child." They looked at me with disbelief. "You weighed less than she weighs NOW, or when she started losing weight?" asked one son. I said, "Less than she weighs now. I weighed 140 pounds."

Wow. And I am a little taller than she is, too. So even though I was not as muscular as Ali, I probably looked about that same build. Yeah, I am sure I did. I remember. And I thought I was fat, too.

But when I say the blinders are falling off, this is what I mean. All these years I thought I was doomed to obesity. My mom was fat, and I was just destined to be fat. My ancestors were Irish and probably survived the potato famine because they had fantastically efficient metabolisms and could survive on very few calories. It was my heritage to be fat and survive famines.

Now I see someone that size and I think, "I totally can see myself there again. I absolutely am going to be that fit. There is no doubt that is my destiny. And I will be in better shape than I was at 20, because I will be eating right and exercising."

I know I won't look 20 again. I know I will probably have flab and sagging skin in some places and wrinkles in others. But my insides will be so much fitter than I ever have been. And I WILL look good. I will look thin, and normal. I am going to look and feel amazing.

Take off your blinders. You don't have to stay fat. See your destiny with fresh eyes, and do something to make it happen... today.


Alli said...

That is so true, I was my goal weight for a few years and I remember never being happy enough even then now I look at pictures from back in those thin days adn I think what was my freaking problem! I looked awesome! I am making sure I wont make that mistake the 2nd time I reach my goal.
Thanks for being such an inspriation to me... I usually lurk on your blog but decided to say hi today!

Dottie said...

Believe it or not I can remember weighing in at the 140 range and thinking I was fat too.. It disgusts me now to think that I thought I was fat. I have a teenage daughter who is 140 and is very fit and looks fabulous. That's where I wanna be!!

Brittany said...

This is an absolutely fantastic post! It's so true. I always thought that hey, my family is obese. So it's in my genes for me. And here I am 73 pounds into my journey, and I'm changing that.

Ali looks absolutely fantastic. And I can't wait to look as fabulous as she does. I've been obese my entire life. And I can't wait to be thin and healthy.

Heather said...

so true! I am about 15 more pounds than I was at 18 and I looked great! had a flat tummy, and now there is tons of fat still jiggling around. but, I am actually much healthier.

I agree about Ali..she looks fantastic. I dont thikn she needs to lose any more weight.

Moe said...

starting the war today. You are my twin, I know about all that you have discussed, and its kind of cool to see the words coming out of someone elses awesome

Kathy said...

It helps to be able to visualize what you're working for.

Sarah said...

I weighed 140 in elementry school. I had always been fat. But no more blinders for me either.

You're doing great!

Natasha said...

Hi there, I've come across your blog and am trying to lose weight as well. Although I honestly can't remember being 140lbs I can relate to feeling like my whole family is obese,so there for I have to blinders are off, and you are correct. I don't have to be. Would love to follow your journey and if you are interested in mine please send some wisdom my way!

MB said...

I remember being in the 140's and still thinking I was fat - I would kill to be there now. When I get to the 140's this time I'm going to appreciate it.

I love your posts but don't get to comment much. You are an inspiration in your determination to get to your goal. I can't wait to see it happen.

Dinah Soar said...

Lynn--I just want to remind you--while you are no longer twenty---you are still a young (yes young!) woman....and you are hitting your stride! Next year at this time I believe you will be at the magic number--that number being your desired weight. It's wonderful you are doing something about it now...while you have lots of great years left.

Ready to Shrink said...

Hide those blinders and never put them on again. You are a wonderful inspiration to me and I can't wait til we all hit goal and are living the healthy lives we all deserve. I don't remember the 140s but I do remember the 170s and I am looking forward to getting there. :)